Sunday, August 12, 2012

Sh*t's getting heavy 'round here

Life is heavy, man. H E A V Y, like my fat ass. And I am getting very tired of carrying this heavy-ass load (in more ways than one). Tony continues to be ill, who knew a mild UTI (tinkle infection for yous non-medical types) would set him back so far health-wise. A stinking damn mild UTI for christsakes so far has entailed; 2 PMD (family dr) visits, 1 liver dr. visit, an ED visit that lead to an over-night stay in the hospital, 3 rounds of blood work, a CT, 2 abt (antifuckyougerms medication) and a new specialist! Woot! No one loves specialist like we do! One mild UTI and I am so frustrated that I could just cry. Well, OK, let's be honest here, it's me, so a lot of crying has already been done.

This medical drama shit is just that, SHIT. The shittiest of the shit. We have been through so very much. Tony especially. Just to get a diagnosis involved all kinds of crazy tests, blood work and a bone marrow biopsy, which was especially a good time according to him. We get to meet a new Dr., a new specialist to run a whole bunch of painful, expensive and exciting tests! I am so damn exicted I can barely contain myself and well Tony, he could just shit, he is so thrilled!

Why and how did the set-back occur? Well, he has a new pain in his left side. Seemed reasonable that it was his kidney but NOOOOOOOO that would make too much sense and be too easy to diagnosis. So this pain? Well it's his damn spleen that hurts. Yeah, yeah, you read that correctly, his spleen is causing all this pain. Who in the hell has spleen pain? I mean really. I would daresay that most of us are unaware that we even have spleens. I mean, I have never said "Oh ouchie, my spleen". But my love-a-dove, well, he gets the special spleen pain because dammit, cirrhosis is just not enough suffering.

So, this is our life. I eat, sleep and breathe medical bullshit.I can't even hear the word liver without crying. Our life is heavy right now, keep this in mind when you see my fat-ass coming by with tears in my eyes and a sigh in my voice. Keep in mind that this shit is heavy.

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