Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Thankfulness, I got it

I am not good with mushy-happy-feel-good feelings. I am much better with hate, doom, gloom and humor that may or may not be appropriate at any time. November is the month of all that is thankful. I usually participate in the thankfulness posts on FB mostly because it annoys the shit out of people and to remind myself that I have a lot to be thankful for.

This year, well, it's not been a normal year. FFS I hope it's not a normal year, never, ever, never a normal year. Although, it's been 5 years ago that my grandma and my mother-in-law died right before thanksgiving. Apparently, November hates me.

Where am I going with this post? Well, I am dancing around it but I want to say that I am thankful. I am very thankful this month for odd things. I am thankful that things aren't worse. How can that be, say you? Well, I could be an uneducated mother of 5 who's husband just died and we didn't have life insurance. Instead of a young employed woman who's husband just died without life insurance. While my life is forever changed, I am not going to starve or have to worry about where my house payment is coming from. Things always can be worse, my most un-favorite saying of all time has become my mantra.

What else is getting my thanks? Well, for all the outpouring of love and kindness, even the hugs. I don't have the words to express how much it means to me. It has been overwhelming. Strangers, friends, and family have all shown me so much understanding and love. I just can't wrap my mind around it. And I am thankful for all of it.

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