Monday, January 11, 2010

Living my life

Maybe a quick blog will help me sleep. You see I have insomnia and it is pissing me off. I hate, hate, hate not being able to sleep. Sleeping is one of my coping mechanisms and boy right now I need all of those coping mechanisms I can get.

But I digress one of the reasons I wanted to blog was to admit that I have checked out on my life. I can't really put a finger on when I started checking out on life but I am thinking I was a pretty small child when I started doing it and I am sure that it was one of my coping mechanisms (damn, I think we are all going to be tired of seeing coping mechanisms) Mom started drinking and I checked out, hid and did my own thing. Is that yelling? Run, run for the hills (or my bedroom with a book and the covers up to my chin). I am by nature an avoider (yeah, I made up a word) I don't like confrontation, yelling, uncomfortable situations, drunks and dealing with life. So I just up and avoid shit. It worked for me. Worked being the key term there. Avoiding shit has caught up with me and now I have some regrets. And regrets suck because there isn't a damn thing that can be done about them.

3 comments:

Kasey said...

I am an avoider as well so I don't have any real advice for you. Maybe we should start Avoiders Anonymous and we can be the new AA.

Angie's Lil' Nothings said...

You think anyone would come to the meetings??

Kasey said...

They would probably just avoid going.

(I am just so witty, haha)